Boring Backgrounds and Confronting Difference

PROMPT #4

I grew up in a small town with a small school system. My Elementary school had only about 600 kids for grades K-4 and our classrooms consisted of about 20 kids. The playground out back was surrounded by a dairy farm on one side, and thick forest on the other two. The front of the building had one road crossing in front of it with a neat little town hall on the other side. I remember the playground being new and freshly painted and I also remember that there was only one black girl in the entire school. Her name was Monique and she had been my best friend. I didn't realize back then that we were two different races, but in high school, where there were only two black students and three Native American students (all of whom were related), that I attended a predominantly white school system and had since kindergarten. And not only that, but my town and the surrounding towns were not culturally and ethically diverse. It wasn't something that was ignored or denied. I knew that I lived in a "white area" as it's referred to by some people.

What does all that mean? That I have a bias. It's not racism, and it's not prejudice, but it's how I've grown up. I've been surrounded by white people. When confronted with diversity, I'm not uncomfortable, but it's something I notice more than others might. Not to say I feel more relaxed when around other white people, but that I'm used to being around white people.

Imagine my surprise when I meet my class and I realize I'm the only white person in the room. The teacher, the students, all different a ethnicity than me. Though, I honestly didn't realize that at first. I actually didn't realize until about my third visit. And that's because nobody else seemed to notice. There was no trumpeting of races, no pointing of fingers saying "look at the white girl", or any indication at all that I was different. That's when I realized that I have been sheltered by my upbringing, and this experience of tutoring in an inner city school is priceless. Because these students are culturally diverse and open and so much more advanced than me, even at such a young age. That's how my teaching them, turned into being taught by them.

Old Wheatstone Elementary is comprised of 64% Hispanic children, 24% African-America children, and 6% each Asian and White children. The predominant group is Hispanic, of which we had none of in any of my schools growing up. It's a shock and an interesting change from my apparently bland upbringing where 96% of the school was white. I feel as if I was missing out all those years.

When I finally become a teacher, if I'm to have a class as diverse as this one (and I hope I do), then I know even this little bit of experience will help me. Though I'm mostly at a disadvantage because of my non-diverse background. My personal history has limited me, at least right now, to not being very understanding. I won't know what these kids are going through with their surroundings, I won't be very aware of different cultures, and I won't know what living in the city is like.

But I do know one thing from my own childhood. Growing up, my family went through a rough patch with money and we went on food stamps for a short time. Even at that time, I was very upset about the change in my life, but looking back, I'm glad for the experience with such a thing. Maybe that little bit of interactive knowledge, I'll be better prepared for my students who come from low SES families.

I think one of the biggest misconceptions that I've had proven wrong, is that inner city kids are rough. Meaning, children from the city are meaner, and wilder, and less intelligent than kids from the country. I don't know where this mindset comes from, and I know it's wrong to begin with, but I still had that notion of these "rough" kids being different. But they aren't different. Each and every child is just a child, no different from any other when dealing with matters of location. They still love to play, and they love to tell stories and climb all over you. I wish I hadn't thought they'd be different, but I'm glad I know the truth now.

Jonathon Kozol states that all children are all equal, but that many white children have more financial aid from their schools that other ethnicities. I remember that my school was rarely worrying about the budget, but here in this school, even paper is hard to come by. According to infoworks state tax records, each student at Old Wheatstone costs $11.42, which doesn't sound too bad compared to my school at $10.38 per student. But the difference comes in with with the fact that my school had four times as much available money for the budget. Factor in that there were fewer students as my school, and the gap between them is vast. Is this equality?

No, this is as far from equality as we can get. And my job as a teacher is to try and close that gap in any way that I can.